Young Unhappy Couple
Young unhappy couple having problems in their relationship

These words keep echoing/swirling in my head as I sit in the dark puffing smoke up to the ceiling. Across from me is the bed with a very lovely lady underneath the warm blanket curled up as she sleeps. She is 5ft 7 inches tall, brown skin like ivory, forget me not eyes and lips that seem to say kiss me quickly. A nice firm back side that you can place a glass filled with wine and it wont spill a drop when she walks across the room.

Yes that’s how good she looks, just staring at her shape gives me the urge to rush over and pull the covers off her. But I’m scared I will make a mess of things. I brave myself and walk over to the bed. I can see her face clearly now. I can also see her smiling as she sleeps, I’m sure she is thinking about the gist she is going to give her lady friends/girlfriends on how poorly I performed in bed after all my excitement and talk earlier in the evening.

I take another long drag on my smoke and wonder what my next move should be. Should I let her sleep in peace and wait for her to wake up in the morning and leave or should I find a quick fix way of being able to perform well in the sack when she wakes up in the morning.

While I was still pondering about this in my head I decided to go online and find out if there was any information out there about Premature Ejaculation that could be of help. Yes, Premature Ejaculation, a touchy subject that fuels marital strife/problem and infidelity from the women in many homes/marriages/relationships.

Premature Ejaculation can be emotionally and physically disappointing for men and women. Most couples who find themselves in this situation brave the storm and stay together for the sake of the children and also to work things out.


Ejaculation is the release of semen from the body. The 3 main types of ejaculation problems are:

  • Premature Ejaculation
  • Delayed Ejaculation
  • Retrograde Ejaculation.

But Premature Ejaculation is the most common ejaculation problem known to man.


Premature Ejaculation occurs when semen is released from the man’s penis sooner than he or his partner expects during sexual intercourse. Premature Ejaculation can occur before or shortly after penetration. It is a treatable condition so there is no need for panic/alarm bells.

NOTE: Premature Ejaculation can happen to both young and old. It only becomes a medical condition when Premature Ejaculation happens frequently.


  • Stress
  • Depression
  • Guilty Feelings
  • Anxiety about performance
  • Sexual Abuse
  • Poor Body Image
  • Relationship Problems
  • Using recreational drugs. eg Cannabis, Alcohol, Caffeine, Tobacco, Cocaine, etc.
  • Prostate Problem
  • Biological reasons – some men may discover that their penis is extra sensitive.

ALSO READ: 8 Qualities of a Healthy Relationship

Gosh now I understand the reason why I ejaculated so quickly, First time together, anxiety about my performance took over. I also had lots of alcohol in my bloodstream and I wanted to make a very good impression with her. Hmm, let’s see if there is a simple solution to this problem so many men like myself face.


  1. Sex with the woman on top reduces the likelihood of premature ejaculation. It also allows her to pull away from you whenever you are close to ejaculating.
  2. Using a thick condom to help decrease sensation during sexual intercourse.
  3. Try controlling your breath by slowly counting backward from 20-1, while thinking of something unrelated to your partner or sex. Counting the ceiling helps some people.
  4. Numbing Cream – reduces the sensitivity on your penis when it’s applied to the head of the penis. It should always be applied 20-30 minutes before sex. You should please remember to wash the numbing cream off the head of your penis 10 minutes before sexual intercourse.
  5. Pills- Antidepressant pills are known to delay ejaculation. The painkiller Tramadol can also delay climax. Taking it a couple of hours before sexual intercourse prolongs ejaculation.
    Note: Side effects of Tramadol include vomiting, indigestion, sweating and drowsiness.
  6. Taking breaks during sexual intercourse and talking with your partner. Talking makes both of you more comfortable with one another and opens you up to the possibility of learning and trying new ways to please your partner.
  7. Foreplay- Prolong foreplay helps to keep the magic alive. It allows the man to gain control over his anxiety, makes him more relaxed and gives him a chance to explore his partner’s body/curves. While learning where best to touch her so he can be able to please her.
  8. Maintaining a healthy lifestyle also goes a long way in helping deal with premature ejaculation. Smoking and drinking are not helpful. Best to spend more time exercising, to improve your strength and stamina.
  9. Balanced Diet – Your diet should be rich in Zinc, Magnesium, Calcium, Selenium, and Iron for strength. High carbohydrate and low protein food are also good to ease anxiety. Example are:
    ⮞ GARLIC- Helps to improve blood circulation
    ⮞ CARROT- Improves blood flow to the genitals during intercourse.
    ⮞ GREEN ONIONS- Increases your stamina and your strength
    ⮞ ASPARAGUS- is jam-packed with Vitamin C and A, It increases your sperm count and enhances your blood pressure.
    ⮞ BLACK PLANTAIN- Increases the amount of iron in your body, which a need for longer staying power.
    PS: Honey and ginger mixed together is also a very good food source, so is watermelon.
  10. Maintaining a healthy attitude towards sex is very important.

ALSO READ: Stress: Exactly How it Impacts Your Body and Brain, What To Do Concerning It

As I raised my head up from my laptop screen I could see the sun rising from the east through my window. Soon its ray of light will spill into the dim room and she will be awake.

I reached out my hand to pick up my unfinished smoke but I recoiled in horror when I recalled that one of the causes of premature ejaculation is smoking and alcohol.

Should I rush out of the house and meet up with the Mallam at the end of my street so I can get some pills before she wakes up or remain sited and wait for her to wake up. It didn’t take me long to decide to leave the house and try to catch up with the Mallam. I ran, jogged to get to the junction but he has already left on the bus to town and won’t be back until 9 pm.

Still breathing a bit hard I decided to jog around the football pitch before heading back home to my apartment. I ended up doing 10 laps around the football pitch, did some push-ups, sit-ups and kegel exercises as well.

NOTE: I will explain more about kegel exercise another time.

Still feeling tired and out of breath, I managed to drag myself back to my apartment. Now all I need is a glass of cold water and a nice cold shower. I discovered the door of my apartment was wide open. I could not remember if in my rush to catch up with the Mallam I forgot to shut the door properly or my guest left while I was out of the house.

I panicked and rushed into the house, there was no one in the living room, I rushed into the bedroom. The bed was made up and empty, she is nowhere to be found. It seems she dashed out of the house the moment she realized I was out. I guess she didn’t want to face me in the morning and make me feel embarrassed about last night.

I sighed and walked to the fridge so I can have a glass of cold water in my body. I feel so dehydrated and sweaty after my morning works out. I think I will just undress and take a cold shower then crawl back into bed. I walk towards the bathroom stall and I could hear the water running, I must have left it on I thought to myself.

I opened the bathroom and there she was standing before me looking surprised. Soap running down her body, cover her breast. I can feel an erection starting the moment I saw her. I closed my eyes and counted backward from 20-1. Just to give me time to actually accept the fact that she is before me nude like the day she was born.

Her first words were Good Morning. I have even forgotten how lovely she sounded when speaking. She has a very melodious voice. I started wondering what she would sound like moaning with pleasure as I nail her to the bedpost.

Calm down Mickey, I keep repeating these words silently to myself while trying to control my anxiety. She reached out her arm and handed me the bar of soap. She turned around and asked me to help scrub her back.

Staring at her backside gives me ideas, but I control myself and do as she requested. Stroking her neck muscles gently while I scrub her back, whispering sweet nonsense softly into her ears. She giggles as I tickle her, I start planting soft tender kisses on her neck and shoulders. Her breathing keeps getting louder and labored. Hmmm, this foreplay technique is not so bad after all.

We wash up and move into the bedroom, I run my fingers up and down her spine as I kiss her tender lips. She shivers and starts kissing me back on the lips slowly while taking her time to play with my nipples. Ouch, she just bit my right nipple. Ohh she is bad, but I’m loving it.

I told her to give me a few seconds. I walked directly to the fridge for some ice-cream. What’s the ice-cream for I hear you ask. Well, I’m not going to put it on the head of my penis to numb it if that is what you were thinking.

I’m going to feed her some ice-cream then apply the rest all over her gorgeous body then take my time licking it off her. I’m sure the task will take me about 20-30 minutes to complete. I wonder what will happen next when I’m done with licking the ice-cream off her.

I will keep you guys posted about how things went with her. If the ice-cream deal works wonders then I will share more with you.

Question: How many minutes do you feel/think is good sex. Ladies and Gents your response to the question will be highly appreciated. Thanks for reading and have a happy holiday.

NOTE: If you are still experiencing feelings of anxiety or frustration about your sex life, please consider seeing a sex therapist to save your relationship or marriage.


  1. I don’t think time is the ultimate when it comes to having a good sex, a good sex starts with the consent of both partners it may be a quickie if both agree. It could start with a very good foreplay with whispers if consented while penetration could be momentarily done hitting the right spots while touching and stroking the right places and lines respectively. You need to know the body you are having sex with while communicating in the language that body understands. Not everybody likes lousy people so not every lady like elongated sex


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