Long after a break up we often find truth in the saying “Absence makes the heart grow fonder”, which is probably how you’re feeling right now. And maybe your ex feels the same way? But if you don’t do anything about it then you’ll never find out to get back together. So… how do you get your ex back?
The Strategy That Works
Although it may sound deceptively simple (as relationships are complicated) the process to reconnect is easier than you think and quite straightforward reinvent yourself, then when you’re ready, contact your ex and offer a date he or she can’t refuse. Now explore the following framework to learn just how you can do it!
1. Reinvent Yourself
It certainly helps if you give your ex a reason to want to see you again. Ask yourself what attracted your ex to you in the first place and what flaws need to be improved, which lead to the first answers on how do you get your ex back:
- Kiss bad behaviors goodbye: Because it’s been awhile since the last time you saw your ex, you probably have worked on improving a couple of undesirable behaviors, whether it be simply bad manners or a major issue. If not, get to it, but keep in mind, you’re really doing this for the benefit of yourself.
- Build your self-esteem: You’re going to need it to reconnect, and besides confidence is a characteristic the opposite sex finds appealing. And remember confidence begets confidence.
- Perk yourself up: How do you get your ex back? Give your attitude and appearance a makeover. You want to look, feel and act your best as this is your second chance to make a first impression, and maybe your last.
2. How to Start the Conversation
First you must plan what you’re going to say, and next how to approach your ex. Only you can determine the dialog, but here are a few tips:
- Stick to small talk: The last thing you want to do is enter a heart wrenching discussion or heated debate that will open old wounds. Instead, keep the conversation positive, playful and light hearted as this will create safe boundaries, a warm atmosphere and good vibes between the two of you, which is an important tip if you want to know “how do you get your ex back?”.
Don’t mistake small talk with trivial or boring chats about your new favorite pizza topping. It’s intriguing and exciting bits of information conveyed through a positive, entertaining and welcoming style. And if the past comes up, be sure to keep the focus on the pleasant past experiences.
- Share something new about yourself: Since the break-up you probably have visited some exciting places, engaged in new hobbies and interesting activities, or experienced a work related change.
So drop a compelling tidbit about yourself and what you’ve been doing to grab you ex’s attention, which will lure him/her into wanting to know more. So how do you get your ex back– keep them wondering by saving all the great details for the future date.
- Find a good reason to contact your ex: Even if it’s just “I’ve been thinking about you… “, come up with a good “excuse” to get in touch. Make it clear that you would like to get together as friends and just have some fun, which will take the pressure off of both of you.
Maybe you have something that belongs to your ex, if so start a conversation that you were going through your belongings and found…, which brought back good memories.
Or if your ex’s favorite performer or event is coming to town, relay the news to your ex stating how it reminded of you of him or her, and then ask if they’d like to go to the venue for the fun of it.
If you’re looking for answers on how do you get your ex back, the possibilities to reconnect are endless, so get your brain storming and make a play.
3. Reach Out and Contact Your Ex
You can contact your ex in person or by phone, or if you’re nervous to feel more comfortable, try a less direct approach: send a text, email or a token of your heart.
Deliver a message in a bottle, filled with sand, shells and a flower, along with an old love letter to touch your ex’s heart. And ask him or her to give you a call. Be creative to discover more ideas on how do you get your ex back.
4. How to Get Your Ex To Accept a Date
The secret behind a great date to reconnect the two of you, melds fun and adventure with great conversation. We’ve already discussed conversation tips, but that alone won’t turn a spark into a flame.
You want to get your hearts racing through physical activity! Research shows that new experiences, high energy levels, hands on activities and physical touch all trigger the feel good hormones in our bodies.
If you are wondering how do you get your ex back, then follow these steps for a great framework to start the process. Now collect your wits, contact your ex and invite him or her on a date they can’t refuse!